Clearly, 

                                                         I have spent my whole life

                                                         being in love with stupid 

                                                         people.

"I always say I love you when I mean turn out the light." - The Magnetic Fields 

I drank from your mouth

on the couch

and moved right in to unearthed regions

without trepidation 

***

and everything that happens

are quick grazes of intimacy

& everything else is romantic

while sitting alone in a well lit room

***

Go on. Look at me. Look at my eyes. I'll kill you. Sometimes I stand in front of the mirror and my eyes get bigger and bigger. And I'm like a tiger. I like tigers. Rrrrah!

- If...

From The Testament of Dr. Mabuse, 1933

night dream about person far away, sometimes the subconscious just wins.

-{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}-

your singing into the phone

& calling me ridiculous

but I still want to reach you

& and smother you with looks

& all the nightime round contemplation

I want to linger on your neck

& touch your chest

& nightime will hold me

this is the way you say everything

remark on passing cars

or comment on the price of drinks

with disgust in your time

& I

wrapping the cord around my fingers

listening to you hating me

to swoon.

it is a pity more people can't experience your thoughts. just you and you probably waste them.

i am currently circling the moon. no need for anything else thank you.

(i gritted my teeth. I didn't really mean it. I Really didn't mean it. I just wanted to see your face contort with fear. Sorry.)

Listening to: Only in Dreams by Weezer- back to the times when i thought I knew what complicated and affection meant

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please leave me be, Gary Gilmore.

please also see: pumpkin seeds by devendra banhart

"She was an ugly and mean-spirited kid, but she knew how to play upon my weaknesses,

which, I admit, are deep and many." - Henry Fool

i feel bittersweet doom around stiff corners.

it's springtime.

my brain is all boozemelt and affection.

see Dirty Cartoons by Menomena

I will start making better decisions, tomorrow.

Tonight I will watch video clips about cults and compounds, in an attempt to escape my own lack of perspective.