this weekend cannot be explained,
so i will list highlights:
1. tattoos
2. yelling and dancing
3. drunk friends who you never get to see drunk.
4. laying on the floor
5. Stump's kitchen web
there are many more but my eyes are starting to close.

Take Me Down by Smashing Pumpkins
Broken Social Scene is good for imagining away
winter.

[grimace]

[grimace]

i am drunk and we still have the same stupid fucking president.
i am pissed.

i have been having long drawn out dreams that involve everyone i know
or have ever known. the dreams always take place in mansions, full of
secrets and places for intrigue. there are lots of parties and plots that
are never developed. and i keep conciously trying to push through the
dreams to get to the end. but there is never an end. nothing is resolved.
wonder where the ol' subconcious picked that up...

guilty cubicles by broken social scene
same ghost every night by wolf parade

fort.

i am an anxiety ridden individual today.
i feel like i am in unfamiliar waters.

songs for taking two deep breaths:
say yes by elliot smith
grounds fo divorce by wolf parade
bela lugosi's dead by nouvelle vague

loom.loom.loom.
oh, quiet night.

Georgia O'Keefe

last nite.
kept repeating in my head all day.
all i want, never happens over and over again.
i don't understand.
i wish i could stop thinking.
i am irritating even myself with my emo-ness.

Ceremony by New Order

i equals alone and drunk.
again.

ugh.

this furious winter
blows discontently
and the snow glows
exposed skin freezes
as it brushes the air
this furious winter
has no soul
just heavy clouds
that cover airplanes
and close the sky
shrunk and
born down upon us
threatening the quiet death
this furious winter has come.

carresses by m83

i went on my hipster pilgramage today.
and David Amram was there.

"I have renounced fiction and fear, there is nothing to do
but write the truth." -Jack Kerouac

i am having bizarre surges of feelings that i thought i had
squelched (well mostly).
this is only componded by a catalog of horrible pop love
songs that are filling my mind.
in the imortal words of nancy kerrigan, why? why? why?

if i were going to write about something
(which i am apparently incapable of lately)
it would involve the snow and how it won't
f-ing melt and my affection just hanging around,
despite my every effort. It would be metaphorical and
probably overdone and crappy so thank goodness
i didn't write it.

songs to replace the horrible ones:
Hotel Song/Regina Spektor
I'd Rather Go Blind/Irma Thomas
Playground Love/Air

"We are a couple that doesn't touch." -Buffalo '66

this picture seems like it makes no sense in this context for a variety
of reasons, for example the foot of snow that remains on the ground,
but it soothes me.

at least i have a partner in crime now, even if it is plastic.
helpful for momentary lapses of illogical affection.
yes very illogical.

Hard To Be a Girl/Adam Green
A Minha Menina/Os Mutantes
Heard You Got Action/Pony Up!
Siriustar/Deerhoof

go ahead, create your own personal montage.

i'm pretty sure i could survive on triscuts and lust for rest of my life

right now there are a lot of things that i am hoping will go right.

I have just a little lovin' by dusty springfield in my head.
i don't really mind.

"Enjoy my jacket, which you stole from me." -Lost in Translation

what a stereotypically bittersweet new years.
i am not complaining, it was kind of perfect.

high/low points of the holiday:
1. masks! YELLING! noisemakers!
2. drunkeness
3. drunken dancing (mainly me)
4. "someone can sleep in my bed..."
5. spontaneous charades (f yea)
6. french (another reason to hate it)
7. music- ELO, Icicle Works, Broken Social
Scene, Pinback ect.
8. communication/miscommunication
(both increased by alcohol consumtion)
9. breakfast (bacon, eggs, biscut)
10. cliff coming over at 10am then
walking in on joey hiding in the
bathroom "They are just crashing here for
the night, right?"

girls by death in vegas
too much mazzy star mixed with holiday
hangover can lead to depression
try cry, cry

i am sleepy and myteriously emotional